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Episode transcript from the Close It Now podcast with Sam Wakefield.
Welcome back to Close It Now. Sam Wakefield here. So excited about the guest today. I came across this the other day. For all of you that have listened for a while, if you haven't listened, go back and listen.
We're coming up on 300 episodes, seven and a half years of the Close it now podcast. And you have heard me in the past talk about different personality styles, talk about different assessments, the color codes, all these different things. Well, I came across this gentleman recently, and he was teaching something I've never heard before. It's a different way to quickly recognize your clients and mentally sort them into ways to be able to communicate clearer so you can have a better conversation. So, super excited to bring you on the show today.
This is Mr. Ridgeley Goldsboro. He is a psychologically unemployable serial entrepreneur. I got that right. And author of 22, Count Them, Everybody, 2, 0, 20 books.
And I'm actually in the middle of one that he sent me, but it sounds like I've got quite a few more to go, which is actually really exciting. And, yeah, just an overall awesome dude. So, Ridgely, thanks for being on the show today, man. It's an honor. Delighted to be here and share whatever I can that helps as many people as possible.
Absolutely. Well, let's start with that psychologically unemployable serial entrepreneur, because unpack that for us because that's a mouthful. So I had one job in my life at the tender age of 19. I lasted just a little less than 30 days and realized that working for somebody else was never going to get me where I was trying to go and that if I was building somebody else's dream, I really wasn't building my own. As a matter of fact, if you're not liking your own plan, my mentor, Jim Rohn, Used to say, you're going to fall into somebody else's plan.
What do they have planned for you? And the answer was two words, not much. Right. And so I just went out and started all these different things. I've started 45 different companies over the years.
I will tell you that of those, Sam, two or three were successful, three or four were moderately successful, and the rest were highly educational. And what I mean by that is. We learn, we don't lose. Right? I'm telling you, you know, we bomb a few things you'll pick up.
As long as you learn the lesson you're not losing everything, so you move forward. But certainly have failed many more times than I've succeeded, though, in the overall, it's worked out fairly well. And one of the things that I think is the most important is really understanding communication. How do you relate to people? How can you create some kind of a bond, some kind of relationship, some kind of a trust environment so that people say, wow, I like this person.
It feels right to me, and therefore I'm going to move forward. Since we make decisions based on feelings and then justify them based in logic. Yes. Yes, we do. Long answer.
No, I love it. No, that's great. So that, that's. Thank you for that. That's.
That's. That's a lot of. Lot of books, a lot of com. I'm curious, so since we're on this real quick, how many of the 20 came out of the lessons that you learned from your successful, moderately successful and not as successful companies? All in?
Probably most of them, right? No, the reason I say that is because I didn't start writing. I've been writing all my life, but I didn't make it to book number one until almost the age of 40. And so by that time, many of the companies had come and gone. Lots and lots of learning.
So I say all of them a little bit loosely because I've started a couple more since then. But for the most part, it was the life lessons. It was the school of hard knocks. It was like you have, Sam. I realized at the tender age of 22 that I needed much more education on life.
I had schooling. I then went to law school. I have two master's degrees. I'm kind of a geek. But that didn't really help me in the world of business when I hit the streets and was starting my own company and the first one failed and the second one was not worth anything.
And now you go from there and then you make your first million dollars and then lose it. All again, you're like, wait a second. Okay, I need to take a second. Keep repeating this pattern. Yeah, man.
What's up with this up and down yo yo type thing? And realizing that the problem always is us? It's not the environment. There's always a ton of business out there. There's always another idea you can lock into and go after and learn from.
Jim Rohn used to say, if you don't like your job, consider it a paid internship. Work on your skills while you're there and then go do what you want and figure it out in the next one. And I guess I've adopted that attitude for sure. So I'd say almost every one of those companies, especially the ones that did not work out, were all my teachers. Oh, I love that.
You know, it reminds me of. This is really fun because you're the. The probably the only person in my life that I've ever met that has had such a close relationship with Jim Rohn. Well, I've always said he's been my mentor from the time that I got into personal growth. And so it reminds me of another.
One of his famous quotes is, of course, don't wish it was easier, wish it were better. For things to change, we have to change. For things to get better, we have to get better for sure. He's always saying, don't worry at all about who you are right now, but worry a great deal about who you are becoming. Right?
I mean, that's the whole thing. And as Jim used to say, and I'm blessed to use his same words in Spanish all the time because that was our relationship. I was his voice in Latin America and traveled with Jim all over Latin America and Spain. He used to say, worry very much about who are you hanging out with, what are you looking at, what are you watching, what are you reading and what are you listening to? And you pay attention to those four things.
At the end of the day, every single thing starts with your personal philosophy that determines. Determines your thoughts that determine the actions you take, that determine the results that you get. So back it all the way up to where it all starts. Your personal philosophy. Where's that coming from?
What you read, what you listen to, who you hang out with and what you watch. Not that complicated, very difficult to manage, especially in today's environment where focus, our focus and our ability to focus is stolen by everything that can be thrown at us. By social media out the wazoo, by the advertising, by forms of advertising, by anything that anybody can think of to take our attention for Example, what does Google want to do? Wants you to stay on Google. Why?
So they can charge more money and make more ad dollars. How well is that going for them? Well, their net valuation is up about a trillion dollars with a T in the last 15 months. So obviously, Sam, they're really, really good at it. They're really good at taking your focus and holding onto it for as long as possible.
And my thing on that is pay attention to what you're listening to, watching, reading, who you're hanging out with, because that is who is going to forge who you are moving forward. I always say, you know, I enjoy going into rooms where I feel like I'm the dumbest or least educated person in there. I know I'm walking out of that room better. Do I enjoy mentoring? Sure.
But what I really want to do is go somewhere where the people are smarter than I am, doing something that I'm trying to learn, like AI for example, and that perhaps that'll move the needle forward for me because I'm rubbing elbows with those people and paying attention to what they say. Yeah, you know, this is really fun. I have a so fun story that's not business focused, but it's really incredible how it applies. It was several years. So I've played guitar Since I was 13 and went all the way through college.
Got my physics degree in college, but I had also as many credits to get a music degree that's not the one I chose. And so a few years back, me and a friend of mine, we flew to California and, and went to a three day masterclass with some really, really famous musicians, guitar players, Joe Satriani and a handful of others that were all at that level. And it was really interesting because that entire week we took our guitars because they had jam sessions and the classes all day and play alongs, but I didn't, I ended up just observing and taking notes. I didn't touch my guitar the entire time. But when I got back, I was twice the player that I was when I left.
Because being submerged, just absolutely immersed in that environment and it taught me to listen. I think that's probably. I got more out of it because I didn't touch my guitar then. And I observed and I listened and I paid attention instead of trying to show what I knew. And so when I got back I was able to apply that differently because I heard it differently and so I.
It's really fun because it's like a really short time span to see that kind of result, but it directly applies to what we're talking about. So it's fun how it doesn't matter what it is. It all works the same. Jim used to say, happiness is an inside job. Well, so is personal development.
Right. So is growth. So is whatever. The universe is a funky thing, man. If you believe in cause and effect, which I believe governs everything, then we know that in order for something to manifest on the outside, we have to make the shift on the inside.
And that's what you're talking about. You're out there among greatness, and you're soaking all that greatness in, and you're taking it in and you're paying attention and you're saying, I can do this. The message going, that's internalizing is, I can do this, I can do this. And that internalizing that message is more important than a couple of hours of fingering on a keyboard or whatever it may be on a. What do you call those things at the guitar?
On the neck. Yeah, on the neck of the neck. Right, exactly. Same thing with me when I first got involved with AI and everybody in the room is much younger than I am. I'm thinking, oh, man, do I really have to learn another thing at my age?
I am like, come on now. This is like, whatever. But after I hung out for a little while, I was like, wait, these people aren't any smarter than me. I could do this. And it took having that shift internally to the I can do this.
Jim used to say all the time, whether you believe you can or you can't, you're right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Henry Ford's most famous quote. So you shift it on the inside, and then you get to work. Because he also used to say, the only place that success comes before work is in the dictionary.
True. I'm curious. So you brought something up that I think is really important, especially when we, no matter what we accomplish in life, when it comes to learning something new, when it comes to a skill. But of course, it's in alignment with the belief system and identity piece that we were talking about earlier. But I'd love you to really dive in.
And we're going to get to where we're headed here shortly. But I'd love for you to really dive into this one moment a minute ago when you said about the internal story that you're telling yourself, I'm older than these guys do. I really need to learn one more thing. All of these limiting beliefs and where they come from. So love for you to unpack that for us.
And then also the dynamic shift of how. Because so many people, especially in sales, they get so stuck with this limited belief. And one of the biggest things, I mean, when I'm training, it's like most of the time, most of the people, they have the skills already. They just don't believe that they do. And so if I can help them to just believe it, all of a sudden their numbers start to go up because now they see what's possible.
And so how did that shift for you in that limiting belief and change and then. Cause I know you're an expert, this. How would you walk somebody through getting past that in their own mind? So a couple things to unpack there, Sam, and I hope I'm not going to dispute the way you do things, but that's why we're here, right? That's it, man.
We're learning from everybody. First thing is that when you take that first step, Jim used to always say, every master started out as a beginner. Every single master. Nobody goes from beginner to master really fast. There's a journey that we all have to be on.
And I would suggest to you that embracing that concept out of the gate, that you got to be bad to be good. You got to just do in order to learn, in order to be better at that thing, whatever it is. I think what stops people often is the fear of failure before they even get started. So they're not focused enough on where they're trying to go to be willing to pay the price to do what they need to do to get there. And I think that's a big deal.
How do I. And we get into the concept of your why, what drives you, what's motivating you? And that'll tie into what we're going to talk about a little bit in just a little. A little while. What is the thing that is important enough to get you going and fighting through the obstacles so that you're learning, so that you're continuing to go.
And Jim, I remember, and I know, I'm sure you know about the law of the numbers that Jim would talk about. He's saying, hey, if you really want to make a lot of sales, let's just consider this. Let's suppose that somebody is 50% good at sales and they make 10 calls. There's a chance that they're going to talk to five people. And now let's talk about somebody who's 20% good at sales but makes a hundred calls.
How many are they going to talk to? Oh, 20 people. What is the. What is the. In other words, one person was Willing to do more with what they had their, so to speak, their potential.
And the other person was trying to rely on talent. If you look at potential and talent, those two things are very, very interesting. In Buddhism, which is a philosophy that I've studied as well in my super geekness, they talk about that. Who would you rather have someone that has tremendous talent or someone that was really going after their potential? And generally speaking, it's that determination piece.
I'm going to get this done. I'm going to keep fighting no matter what. I'm going to get up as many times as I need to and recognize that when I fall down, I can either a lie in the ditch or look up and focus on the stars and get up again and go after it. Right. So first of all, I think it's the beginning piece is the hardest.
The second thing that I don't know how anybody gets around is the fact that repetition is the mother of all success. And there is a certain amount of doing what you're trying to do well over and over until you become good at it. That is very real. Now here's a subtlety. There are people who are already good at the thing, but because of what you're talking about, the lack of belief that they're good, they still have to go through the repetition until they begin to feel inside, I'm now good.
And then that transmits in the sales process. Wow. Because nobody wants to be with the loser. Oh no, I'm gonna buy this stuff from that loser sales guy. No, that's just not gonna happen.
The pity's the one they're, they want to, you know, let's face it, confidence is contagious. Yeah. You need to be confident that whatever product or service you're offering is going to create and bring value. And if you have to go through X many repetitions of saying the exact same thing in the exact same intonation because of the fact that you need that for your own confidence, then you got to go through the repetitions and one day it kind of clicks and then you start to have this kind of belief. Like I remember when I was up against writing my first book, it was just so daunting.
And then the oh man, how am I gonna write a book? I mean, writing a book, that's like so hard. It's so difficult. And then the second book, ah, man, am I gonna go through this again. This book, I mean, I remember the last one.
I was so agonizing. I spent more time agonizing about about what I was gonna agonize about than about actually writing the book. By the time you get to book three, it's a little bit easier. By book four, you're cooking along. And by now, now it's like, okay, I'm just going to write another book.
And there's no anxiety attached to the writing of the book. It's just the doing of it. But it took 20 books to get there. Maybe I was there by book 10. I don't remember.
But it just took a lot of effort of getting to the place where I believed I could do it. That turned into a knowingness, that turned into a being. Oh, I am an author. This is what I do. And I can just start today, tomorrow, or the next day, and it's fine.
Yeah, beautiful. I love this. And I'm partly angry at you right now because I've been for the last. Call it three, four years in this struggle where my book is 80% done. And it's been that way for three years now.
And so. Ridgely, you jerk. And also, thank you. I needed to hear that both at the same time. Hey, man, you want the easiest way to finish it?
Yes, yes, yes. Okay. And I don't want to hear AI, because I'm not AI. I'm talking about non AI finishing the book. The easiest way to finish the book is to get a big whiteboard of some kind and then start outlining the book using sticky notes.
Okay. You use sticky notes. So you get a bunch of sticky notes and you start sticking them on the board. This is the outline. Oh, chapter one, chapter two, chapter three.
Then you step back, I'll go, you know what? Chapter four should really be where chapter six is. Chapter five. Oh, I've got another idea for another chapter. Write it on a sticky note.
Slap it on the board. Write it on a sticky note, slap it on the board. And then you'll see it's coming alive as you keep putting more sticky notes and moving the sticky notes around. In fact, I would even recommend big sticky notes for important concepts, little sticky notes for others. And then you can.
That, to me, is the easiest way to write a book. And it's kind of fun. It's almost like a puzzle. There you go. I think there's like four or five ways of writing.
I think that's the easiest. I love it and I appreciate that. That's visually how I think. So for anybody out there and all of you out there who are listening, I know there's. Because I've talked to a lot of you that have mentioned to me in fact, several of you across this last period of time have written and or sent me books that you have written.
So if you're writing a book, great advice. If you've written one, send it in. And I'd love to read it, which is really cool. So with my personality, that is a great way for me to do it. Speaking of personalities, that's a fun segue, because let's get into.
So for a lot of you listening, this is one of the things that Mr. Ridgley is known for, is what we're about to get into. So first of all, give us. Set us some context. Give us some set and setting for what we're about to talk about.
And how did you, first of all, come up with a lot of this? Is this original? Where's your modifications? Give us some set and setting and context, and then take us through this. Because for everybody, listen, this is a very different take on personality styles than I've ever seen before.
And I immediately wanted to have Ridgely on the show to talk about this. Fantastic. So let me ask you a question, Sam. When you were an infant and you wanted milk, what did you do? Well, I don't remember, but probably cried, right?
And what happened when you cried? Got milk? It got louder, right? Somebody brought you milk. And all of a sudden, there's an association in that moment that forms at a very primitive level.
Crying equals success. So then you wake up in the middle of the night and you're in your crib, and it's dark and lonely and scary, and what do you do? Well, probably cried again, right? And what happens? I'm sure my mom came and got me exactly right.
And the association got stronger. Crying equals success. And from that moment forward, every time you needed or wanted anything, what did you do? That would be crying still. That's exactly right.
Until there comes a moment when mom, dad, caretaker says, sam, you don't get to just get whatever you want by shrieking and yelling and crying. Sorry, pal. Now, hang on. I'm an only child. So that was probably years later than it should have been, right?
Probably true. Nonetheless, at some point. At some point, they came along and said, hey, you can't get whatever you want by crying. And you had to do something else to get your wants and needs met, because you still had the wants and needs. They did not go away.
So you try something else, and it works. This other action works. And it creates a tiny little thread of belief in the back of your subconscious somewhere deeply buried. You have another need. You try something different.
It doesn't work, you discard that action. You have a third need. You try something different yet again, that doesn't work either. You discard that action as well. You have another need, and you go back to that first thing that worked.
And it works again. And it creates another little thread of belief, and it wraps around the first one and creating a slightly stronger belief thread, if you will. Now, one or two threads, not going to do a whole lot, but imagine thousands of little threads wrapped around each other to create one giant cable. That giant cable, what would it hold up? Anything.
It's called your belief system. And it does not and will not change in this incarnation. So if it stands to reason that that thing that worked, that thing that you did, that created this belief system, is going to stay with you, and you're going to keep on doing that for the rest of this incarnation, for the rest of your lives, life. And as they say, lepers don't change their spots. What they're really saying is we as human beings don't change the behavior that successfully enabled us to emotionally survive in our developmental years.
Very, very early on. A little bit complicated, but basically in simple languages. If it works, you keep doing it. It shapes your personality. It becomes why you do what you do.
And each of us have a why we do what we do that forms what I call a mind type. The mind type that is created by your why, that will not change at all. And by the way, really therefore important to know what it is so that you can understand yourself and act accordingly. All of the mind types have a superpower, something that you do really, really well, and a kryptonite, something that's going to hold you back in the event that you don't learn how to manage that. So if you want, we can go through them all.
Yeah, let's do it. And this is so for everybody, this is. I went through it for the first time the other day and had a couple aha Moments, just in the. By the. By definition.
And so I'm really excited to dive in a little deeper today to learn more about this. Yeah. So we're going to walk through it. There are seven different mind types. And again, each one has a superpower.
Each one has a kryptonite. We'll go through the definitions of them. And for those who are watching or listening, don't worry about this too much. Just see which one feels right. Remember, we make decisions based on feelings and we justify them in logic.
The things that you do in your life, even if you're an analytical Person are driven by a very deep feeling, emotional feeling that comes from the limbic or emotional brain, which is right at the heart of the brain and has been around for way longer than the external brain or the neocortex, what we call the thinking brain that has now surrounding the limbic brain. So we do things from a very primitive place, it's called basically, it stemmed from survival. How do we survive as a species? And that's what led to us figuring out why we do what we do and what is the mind type created by our why? I'm going to walk you through that.
Yeah. So first, what that limbic brain, Just real quick question. Is that what a lot of people may have referred to as like the. The lizard brain or the crocodile brain? Yeah, crocodile emotional brain, some people like to call it.
It's basically the thing that is the driver that was survival or perish. So obviously it has much more impetus for us as human beings than red lot light stop, green light go, which is a thinking process, much younger process for Homo sapiens or human beings. So when we understand where we're coming from and can tap into that primitive space, we understand the innate driver that literally guides everything we do, everything we say, every action we take, and consequently the results, as Jim Rohn would have showed, talked to both of us about. Right, so let's walk through this. Yeah.
Mind type number one, the giver. The giver is the person who loves to make a difference, to add value. The giver loves to show up and help in whatever way they can. They're the people who bring the donuts to the office for everybody else. The first people to volunteer for the PTA or the community service or the church group, whatever it is.
The giver. The giver's superpower is causes. They're all about making causes. What can I do to help? How can I show up for my kids in school?
What can I do for my community? Now the challenge with that is that the giver has a really hard time saying the no word doesn't want to come out of their mouth and consequently their kryptonite is over commitment. They say yes to too many causes and therefore they're always over committed. Which results in two things. Number one, not being able to accomplish what they want to because they have too much on their plate.
Or number two, simply letting it fall through the cracks. Neither a desirable result. And we can get into, if we have time, Sam, how to overcome all of the kryptonites. But at the end of the day, you can see how important it would be to know on your team, in your family, who are the givers, who are the ones that are going to say yes to everything. By the way, if it's a family member, they probably don't have any money because they're always giving it away to all the people that ask for it.
Because family members get hip to the concept that they're likely to say yes and have a hard time saying no. All right, moving on. So much of this. So there's a couple lenses I'm. I'm also viewing this through and listening through, which is really beautiful.
So. And I, man, I really, really appreciate you going through these. So we're seeing it both one, to understand ourself and our family and our internal communities. And then at the same time, once we unders and we have to understand ourself to be able to understand others. But also for everybody that's listening, view all of these through the lens of what's your potential client and how do we speak their language?
But then also if that's different than your own. This is why sometimes we resonate with some people immediately because, hey, we're the same. But then sometimes it's so much more difficult because your language and their language doesn't match up until we understand the difference and then learn how to communicate in that. So I just wanted to add that in here real quick. As we're going through these, Everybody view it through both the lens of yourself and also the lens of how to communicate to others that are the other types.
Yeah, for sure. And so we even have what we call communication keywords for each of the mind types. And if you know. So, Sam, what is the most powerful word in your vocabulary? I.
Yep. Because you react to that immediately. Communication keywords are just that powerful. If you know someone's mind type and you know their communication keywords, they will respond to those words as strongly as they respond to their name. So for the giver, for example, communication keywords are give, contribute, make a difference, add value.
If I use that languaging in my communication in my sales process to a giver, guarantee that they're going to feel their chest puffing up. That's right. That's me. I do give a lot. I do make a difference.
I do add value. And then you're going to build that trust relationship. And we both know that trust is the number one thing that's going to close a sale anyway. Beautiful. Right?
So, so. And by the way, very helpful for you to interrupt me and kind of, you know, hey, what about this? Let's talk about that, etc. It adds more context and makes it more interesting. And I will, by the way, at the end, quickly go through all seven.
So don't worry about it. If you're already kind of like, oh, my gosh, I need to know this, but I'm lost. Don't worry about it. And some of this, we'll have the list of each of them and how to get a hold of Ridgeline to learn more in all the show notes as well for everybody. So if you're driving a lot of you in Drive Time University, it'll be in the show notes.
No worries. Number two, the connector. The connector is all about bonds and relationships. These are the people who do what they say they're going to do. They show up when they say they're going to show up.
They are totally reliable. Why? Because their superpower is trust. Trust is everything to the connector. You know, you can count on them.
How important would it be to know who those people are in your environment? Whether that's work or familial doesn't matter. What is the kryptonite? Well, the connector is so determined to be trusted and prove that they're trustworthy that they'll do the extra, then the extra, then the extra, then the extra, then a little bit more to show their trustworthiness. Here's the challenge with that.
The first extra takes any of us from being ordinary to becoming extraordinary, something we can all aspire to. However, every other extra after that just makes you nice. Oh, that person's so nice. They're always doing the extra. And the reason behind the connector doing that is they're trying to prove trustworthiness to the rest of the world.
They're just nice. So in other words, the objective is not being met by doing the extra, extra, extra, extra, and they end up wasting a lot of time and effort. So waste is the kryptonite of the connector, but it comes from trying to prove what is their superpower. Trust. Very interesting.
Little dynamic there. All right, number three, so real quick, along along the way, what are those keywords for the connector that we're looking for? Reliable, trustworthy, count on, be there, show up. All those kind of words that are indicative of I'm going to do what I say I'm going to do. Beautiful, right?
And so how does that work, though? But, man, that's kind of funky. Well, that sounds. Seems like the giver and the connector would get along really well. And the answer is not really, you know, why because the giver says yes to too many things and then doesn't come through.
So it violates the trust of the connector. So if you can see, they immediately are on a collision course. Unless Sam, which is the case of all of the mind types, they understand each other's mind type. Because then the connector might say to the giver, hey, I need some help with something, but I really need to know if you have time to do this. If you don't have time, a no is an okay answer with me.
Right? As opposed to having the giver say yes, not come through because they're over committed, they're kryptonite, and then the connector have their trust violated. Bam. Instant separation. Right.
Even those are both two emotionally based mind types. When they're not coming at it from the, from the knowing place of how each other sees the world, which happens to all of us in all of our communications. It's a real challenge. Make it sense. Absolutely.
Well, one of the reasons for that is because my, my primary mind type is number three, the problem solver. The problem solver is the make sense person. This is the person who takes in lots and lots of data at warp speed, analyzes it, goes through a process saying, wow, well if this, then this, if that, then this and makes sense out of things for the rest of us. The problem solver's superpower is solutions. They're really, really good at coming up with solutions and doing so quickly.
The challenge for the problem solver is when the problem solver doesn't have enough data, their brain gets mushy. They get that deer in the headlights look like. And if they don't have enough data, they go into paralysis. The kryptonite of the problem solver. I, for example, will frequently find myself near the end of a day staring at my computer screen until I wake up and say, whoa, whoa, whoa, you don't have enough data?
Go get some more data, retrigger your mind, get back in gear, because right now you are paralyzed. That is the kryptonite of the problem solver. All right, moving on. The innovator. The innovator.
These are the better way people. These are the people who are looking for a better way to do anything and everything. I mean, doesn't matter whether it's reorganizing your desk to having a new manufacturing process, a new sales cycle, it doesn't matter. They're going to constantly ask questions, what about this? What about that?
What about this other thing? Well, how about we try this? What if we did this over Here, they're always curious and coming up with improvements, which is their superpower. They're better way people. They come up with better ways of doing things.
So what would be the kryptonite? Change for change's sake. They don't really care if it's going to upset morale, if it's economically not feasible or foolish or whatever. They just want to make things better. They are also the people that have a great deal of difficulty ordering food in restaurants.
Have you ever been with a friend? And they're looking at the menu, and they're looking at the menu and they can't. And they're looking at them. I think I should have this, but maybe this is better. Maybe this might be better.
Oh, man. And then you find themselves calling over the waiter or the waitress and saying,. What do you recommend? Hey, let me ask you a question. What's your favorite thing on the menu?
Right? And then, oh, well, people really love this. And then the innovator says, that sounds really good, but could you do it like this and this and this? And they try to make it better right there in real time. Those are the innovators of the world.
Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I know those people. It's like, come on, it's not a tattoo. It's not going to. It's.
You're getting rid of it tomorrow. Let's just pick something. Right. Exactly. Get rid of it tomorrow.
Exactly. Number five, the perfectionist. These are the right way people. These people believe there's a right way to do things and things should be done right. If I know A and B and C and D.
E is predictable. So what is their superpower? Systems. They love systems. They hate chaos.
They love order. They want to put things in their place because everything has a place and the thing should be in that place. Right? That's what they do. Systems of their superpower.
What is their kryptonite? Rigidity. They're a little bit too much my way or the highway. We both know there's always another way if you seek it out. But perfectionism is like, no, no, no, this is the right way.
There's a right way to do things, and let's just do things right. Usually my way. Now, we know that that's not exactly true, but they're really great at systems, and we need people like this to lay out the grids of cities, to make things process the way they're supposed to. Very important, but they can be a little rigid. No doubt.
I need these people in my life. That's for sure, of course. Right. Number six. The rebel.
The rebel. The rebel is the person that thinks differently. These people live outside the box. These are the people who, if you say left, they want to go right, you say, why not? They say, why.
It's just what they do. Their superpower is to challenge things. They challenge the norm. They challenge the status quo. They challenge the vanilla.
I know you're laughing over there, Sam,. Because, you know, all of the personality. Dozens of personality tests I've taken, I've never come across one that explains me better than this. Right here is the rebel. Right?
Sam is the rebel. You know, you just think differently than everybody else. And by the way, that's fantastic. Some of the greatest people on earth, the visionaries, were the rebels. Think Steve Jobs of Apple.
He literally revolutionized multiple things throughout his career. Even when they kicked him out of his own company, he went and created Pixar and revolutionized the way animation was done, which he then sold to Disney, making the Jobs family one of the largest shareholders of Disney, and then came back to Apple and revolutionized it again. Rebel thinking differently all the time. Their strength is to challenge. Challenge the status quo.
That is the superpower of the rebel. So what is the kryptonite? Well, often the rebel challenges everyone and everything, and people start to push you away, like, stop it, man. Stop challenging me. Like, hey, go away.
Whatever. And isolation becomes the kryptonite of the rebel, because either people push them away and they feel isolated, or rebels sometimes can often isolate themselves as a result of feeling misunderstood. So does that resonate for you, Sam? Yeah, it directly resonates. Well, it's funny because.
Real quick, since we're on this, I heard you say this actually the last time we went through it. The rebel thinks. Because one of my life philosophies, for years, I've said this since college, when everyone says, why? I ask why not? And it's what I've lived by for most of my life.
And I didn't even realize it was related to this. And you actually used that specific terminology as an example the last time I heard you describe this one. And so it's. It just applies. And when you know that and you can embrace that, it becomes a source of strength.
Because now, you know, you think differently than everybody else, which means your potential to have a different result is better than everybody else's. And when you can embrace that, you say, wow, this is such a great strength. Me as a problem solver when I was growing up, my whole life, man, always had to, like, make sense out of everything. And it felt like I was carrying this big weight until I recognized that it was a strength. And now I know.
I know I make sense out of everything. I know I need to shut up when other people are talking because otherwise I'll cut them off and tell them what they need to do. And that's not very helpful. I know it's a guy girl thing, but when it's a problem solver, it's a double whammy. So with my wife, I've learned to zip it right and listen.
Or else, same thing. All of us, when we understand our primary mind type, we know what our strength is, and we can play to that. Which leads us to our final mind type number seven, the Master. These are the super geeks. These are the people whose brain power is just superior to the rest of ours, by the way.
That does not mean that they're more successful. It just means that their cognitive abilities, their ability to take in and process data is greater than any other mind type. These people really know a lot about a lot, but they know especially a lot about the things that they specifically care for. So the superpower of the Master is depth. They want to take things to another level.
So me as a problem solver, for example, I have a cell phone in my hand. I put the cell phone. All I need to do is what buttons do I push to call my mother? And then mom answers. The Master would be the person that says, all right, well, so what happens is you're going to connect through the.
Through a voice processor. It's going to beam a signal up to a satellite. That satellite is going to hit another satellite. That satellite is going to drop down into a microprocessing thing over here that's going to go over to the phone on the other side through a signal. And that.
I don't need to know all that. I just need to know how the thing works. Class saying, this is the person that when you ask them what time it is, they're going to tell you how to build the watch. Yeah, I mean, they just have to know all that stuff. So what is the kryptonite of the Master?
If the superpower is depth, the kryptonite is complexity. They make things too complicated for the rest of us. They're the kind of. Because their brains are so huge, they're the kind of people that you want. To walk up to them and say,.
Hey, listen, man, I got a question for you, and I know you're really smart and you probably know the answer,. But could you Just give me the short version. Right? Because you know that they could just go down a rabbit hole as they're explaining it all so very, very quickly. Again, you have the giver, the person that loves to make a difference, add value.
Superpower causes kryptonite over commitment. You have the connector all about bonds and relationships. Superpower trust. Kryptonite waste for trying too hard to build that trust. You have the problem solver making sense out of things.
For all of us, superpower is solutions. Kryptonite paralysis. When they don't have enough data, you then have the innovator. The better way people always looking to find a better way. Superpower improvements, Kryptonite change for change's sake.
Then you have the perfectionist again, the right way people, they love to do things right. Superpower systems. Kryptonite rigidity. You have the rebel always challenging everything and anything. Superpower is challenge.
Kryptonite isolation. And finally you have the master. Really, really smart people always going to the next level. Superpower depth. Kryptonite complexity.
All of us have a primary mind type. Why we do what we do. And then we have a secondary generally shows up as how you do that thing and a tertiary what you do. And now if you think about that in terms of complexities of how many human beings there are out there, that means seven mind types times the remaining six that could be the secondary times the remaining five that could be the tertiary, or 210 different ramifications of what a human being might look like. So it's not like we're all the same in any way, shape or form.
Even in this personality typing system, there's still 210 variations. Right? Oh, love it. This is so good. So could you do something for me here?
Because we started it with the first two and we've got a few minutes left in our time together here. I would love it if we could go through and because this is one. So we're going to go. So for everybody, we're going to go through these again and each one give us those connector words, communication keywords for all seven of those, because I think this is one of the ways. So first of all, I'm sure you have way more on this, so we definitely want to get that from you because I'm super intrigued to dive in a whole lot deeper than just this 10,000 foot view.
But also one thing that this podcast is known for is giving people those actionable steps to be able to immediately apply. So that's why I want us to Take this super quick little detour. And what are those three, four, five words that. So when we recognize in the. When we're.
If we pay attention to this and y' all listen to this episode a few times and get rid of these stuff and study this, when we recognize that we're talking to a connector, say, or a perfectionist or whatever, how can we start to shift our language in the home to basically to speak to that piece of their brain, that limbic brain that is going to make their chest puff out like you were saying, and say, hey, that's me, that he's talking to me. Because that's how we start to make those connections and those trust connections. Yeah. And if you want to add anything into that, of course, feel free. Yeah.
Let me just add one thing, and that is what is our natural tendency? Our natural tendency is to use our own communication keywords, the ones that resonate with us and that goes back all the way to biblical references of the Golden Rule. So what is the Golden Rule? The Golden Rule says, do unto others as I would like done unto me. Right.
I'm going to suggest to you, Sam, that that's kind of ridiculous because it implies that everybody is the same. In other words, is it philosophically a lovely thought. Sure. Does it make people think, oh, I'm going to try harder to be kinder, gentler, more empathetic? Yes.
But how about this? How about the rainbow rule? Do unto others as they would like done unto them. Flip it. It's all about them.
What are the top three rules of marketing? You and I have talked about this. Rule number one, it's all about them. Rule number two, it's all about them. Rule number three, everybody can probably figure it out, Right.
Just say about them. Yep. So if you can speak their language, the language that resonates with them, then you are going to connect far more deeply. So I'll run through this quickly and then I'll give you a couple examples. So again, we have the giver and the giver is all about causes.
So communication. Keywords for the giver are contribute, add, value, give, make a difference, help people, support. Those are keywords for that. Connector, bonds, relationships, reliable, trustworthy, count on you. Get the problem solver.
Makes sense. Figure out step by step, logical progression, etc. You get the innovator, innovate better way, improve, different. Right. Perfectionist.
Again, the perfectionist. The right way people. So it's the right way. Precise, accurate, systematic. You get the revel, the challenging.
It's going to be challenging. Challenge different, visionary, even contrarian, right? Those kind of words are going to come up and then the master who loves to go deeper, it's going to be sovereign, intelligent, brilliant, learning, all those kinds of things. So imagine, imagine now that I have a product, right? I have a product and I'm selling this product and I know who I'm talking to, what or a service, it doesn't matter.
We'll pick a product because it's easier. And let's say that I'm wanting to connect with. We'll just go with the first two just to make it easy. But we or you can pick whichever my type you want and I'll do it for whatever. Whatever.
Whatever's easier. Throw a rebel in there, since that's me. Actually, let's do us. Let's do a rebel and a problem solver. Okay, great.
Solve problem solver. It's you and I, so that. There you go, application here. So if I'm talking to a problem solver, I'm going to say, you know, I'm looking at this product and I'm considering whether I should participate. And you're so good at making sense out of things, looking at a particular product, breaking it down, giving the step by step process of what result we could get from this.
What is that? What is it going to result, what is it going to turn into in the aftermath? Could you kind of look at this thing for me and see what you can come up with? What kind of solution? What should I do with it?
And that problem solver is going to feel all puffed up. I'm going to do it to you and you're going to share with the audience how you feel when I do this. Okay? Right, okay. So, Sam, I'm checking out this product and you are so good at finding the other perspective, right?
The alternative view on this thing. Really challenging. Does this work or not work? How could we differentiate this from everything else? Could be you're laughing hysterically, right?
Because you can feel it. You can feel the difference. Yeah, I can feel it right in my chest. That's exactly, exactly right. Because that's when I say you're so good at being different, challenging, etc.
Those words speak to the life of who you are. So now. Yeah, Are you kidding me? Exactly. Push back on this.
There's gotta be a different way. And oh, by the way, your ability to say no becomes very difficult even for a rebel who loves to say no to things, because I've just hit you where you live. So imagine now in a sales process and now we're getting deep. I'm make sure that we're not going to go too far or I can come back another time or whatever. Imagine that you had a process by which through a few questions, you could figure out someone's mind type and then immediately flip into communication keywords that touch them exactly.
Right there in their limbic decision making brain. How much more success would you have? Obviously a lot. Of course. Yeah, absolutely.
And this is really fun because I've touched on components of this for years and I've taught variations of it and I've gone through maybe a simpler version, four different color personalities, which is definitely a simplified version of this. Not horribly far off, but enough that it still felt murky. But this gives such clarity to each of the personality types that I feel like it just cuts right through the noise. Exactly. Of course it does.
It cuts right into the limbic system, but it cuts through the noise to be able to speak directly to that person. So Ridgely, I've got a question for you. I mean, you're so good at solving problems for me. How could we do this in such a way where we'll be able to give people exactly what it's going to take for them to dive in deeper and learn a lot more about this? So you tell me we could do.
I know we're kind of running out of time, but this is of course,. This is my problem solving question. Right. Well, I can definitely give people a formula that they can play with. Here's the thing that I recommend.
Don't do it on anybody you care about. Practice with people you don't care about first. Now, I don't mean that in a bad way. Unpack that and why, because I'm all about the why behind stuff. Right.
I can see where some pitfalls might happen there. When you're first starting to figure this thing out, if you were to say to somebody, hey, I learned about this thing called mind types. It's really cool. I'd like to figure out your mind type. Let's do this thing together.
If it's your spouse and you get it wrong, it's just not a good idea. If it's your business partner and you get it wrong, it's not a good idea. And as we talked about at the beginning of this session together at the beginning, you're not going to be that great at it. So practice on people you don't care about and do it in a loving way. In other words, hey, I learned about this thing called mind types.
You want to Check it out, see if I can figure yours out. But, you know, with a friend, that's okay if you get it wrong. That's all I was saying. I know it's a provocative way of expressing it, but the idea is out of concern for them. Let's not practice initially on the people that you care about the most.
Business partners, loved ones, et cetera. Right. So here's what you want to do. You want to start out by asking the question, shall we do it in the context of a sales cycle, Sam? Yeah, absolutely.
That'd probably be the most applicable version here. Here's question number one. We're looking at doing some business together. So let me ask you something. What would be an absolute home run for you?
And someone's going to tap into their emotions to say, what's a home run feel like? Now, if you're not a baseball player, you could say, what would. What would be really knocking it out of the park? Yeah. What would be something that would be a total win for you?
Any way you want to say that. And when they answer the question, listen to the words behind the words. And your second question is going to be, what about that is a home run? So they're going to dictate, dig deeper into the emotional state. And here's question number three.
And this is the exact sequence you need to use to peel back the layers of the onion. Question number three is, why is that important to you? If you ask those three questions, it'll get you very close to understanding someone's mind type. Because if they're very precise in their answer, they. They're likely to be a perfectionist.
If they're resisting the questions in general, they're likely to be the rebel. If they start talking about how they can make a difference, you can see that they're the giver. And then you can flip into using communication keywords, and before you know it, you own them. Yeah, I love this. This is so good, and it's so powerful, not in a way of manipulation, but in a way of just being able to speak the language to be able to serve them better.
That's what I love so much about these types of language patterns and these skills. So for everybody listening, this is a top performer skill. If you want to be a top performer, you learn these types of skills. It directly connects. You don't know top performers that don't understand at least a level of this and how to speak the language of who we're talking to.
So for all of you that listen for a long time When I say things like we meet people where they are, this is exactly what I mean by that. And it goes deep because we're talking about meeting somebody where they live. In other words, it is to the core of their philosophy of how they view the world. The rebel is always going to challenge things. Not sometimes, always.
They may learn to temper their enthusiasm for challenging to be a professional, but in the back of their main their brain, somebody's making some declarative statements. The rebel's like, oh, really? You think? Huh? No, I don't see it that way.
Right. You may not say that, Sam, but I know that's how you're thinking always. And the more declarative the statement, the more rebellious Sam is going to feel. Well, if I happen to know that, I'd say Sam, that sounds kind of ridiculous. How do you see this, man?
I know you see it differently. Come on, lay it on me. And now I am in your world and you are talking to me and I'm speaking your language. So. And it doesn't matter that this applies.
Same strategy if you will. Same way of being applies to any of the mind. This is so good. I wish we had so much more time to dive into this, but we do need to land this plane. So two things.
First of all, I would love for you to give everyone how they can connect with you and learn more about this and the ones that want to go deeper because knowing you as well as I do now, I'm sure that you've got some more behind the scenes here when it comes to this. Yeah. Can we put some stuff in the notes here that the people 100%. Yeah. Okay.
Because I'll be happy to even send you, Sam, maybe the communication keywords list so that everybody can see it. Mind types, personality, all of that. I can send all of that stuff to you so that way we can give it to everybody. Yeah, yeah, I love that. That'd be great.
Yeah. So is there contact? So for everybody, if you want any of that, of course, feel free. Look, just search mind types and you're going to come up with. You'll find a lot of this.
But also email me, it'll be in the. Not email me directly. I'll make sure that you get every bit of what Ridgely has. And man, this has been such a good episode. So what is a parting thought, nugget of wisdom that you want to leave with everyone to round out the show?
Two thoughts. Number one, set yourself on fire because people will come from miles and miles away to watch you burn. Number two, a smile is a little curve that sets a lot of things straight. And if somebody else needs a smile, give them yours. Love it, love it, love it.
Good stuff, man. I, I, I, I, I hear Jim Rohn speaking through you and right. I, I feel it, it's tangible. So it's the legacy. That original thought in my life, but you know, I'm pretty good at R and D.
That's called rip off and duplicate. I mean, you know. No, I don't know about all that. I mean, you have written 20 books. But man, I love it.
Thanks for being a guest today. This has been fantastic. Ridgely does also a couple other things for everybody that is on. He does own a company that we're using as well with some of our clients that does digital marketing. So have a digital marketing company build websites, do SEO, do a huge suite of those different components.
So go ahead and if you would like, give everyone how they can reach out to you just to learn more about that because I know there's going to be, there's always a handful of people that listen that really resonate with every guest that I have on that would love to be in contact and potentially do some, do some work with you. Yeah. com that is one of our core websites. It kind of shares what we do. And any company that we work with, the first thing we're going to do is a limbic messaging workshop to get them that kind of messaging.
That's going to get people to resonate with who they are and what they believe. At the end of the day, digital marketing is only about two things, how do people find you and what happens when they do. We call that traffic and conversion in the industry lingo, if you will. So we're experts at both and we're going to help you with the traffic, we're going to help you with the conversion. And I am more than happy if you have a, if you're a person that runs a business or has a business and you want us to run an audit on how you're doing right now when it comes to AI and online visibility, how are people finding you?
Then go over to local market Dominator, hit us up. And I'd be happy to do that for free as a guest of Sam's. Love that. Thank you. Appreciate that so much.
And for everybody else that everybody that's listening, if you got some value from this episode and or any of the episodes from close it now, I would love a five star review. So go to Google and find Close it now and leave me a review there. Go to Apple Podcasts and anywhere else you listen and if you leave me a five star review and I read it on an episode and you hear that that particular review, message me and you will have earned yourself a free a no charge one hour coaching session with me. And I've never had anyone do that that didn't leave with some really impactful insight and go out and literally immediately close deals right away that they wouldn't have because of what we worked on. So 5 star review will get you a coaching session and otherwise just help support the show.
Because I've never taken a dollar on the show and I do this to give back to the community because I love this home service home improvement space in this whole world. So thanks everybody for list listening. It's been an honor to have you on Ridgely. I appreciate your time investment today. We don't take it lightly and for everybody else out there, you know how we do this.
Learning and mastering skills like this. This is how we how we work to become someone worth buying from. You've been listening to the Close it now podcast. Our passion is to dive head first into the transformation transformative movement that's reshaping the very foundation of HVAC and home improvement and at the same time covering fitness, nutrition, relationships and personal growth, proving that we can indeed have it all. We hope you've enjoyed the show.
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